A Generous Way Of Healing Yourself

Unbirthday Gifting

part 1 2

A person can become completely bummed on their birthday when a gift he has received doesn't quite hit the mark. It is a sad fact of life that an anticipated birthday can set a person up for a big let down. Because of this, more and more, I often adopt unbirthday gifting as my preference. It doesn't matter if you give an imperfect gift to someone on an unbirthday because it is always a surprise. No one complains about surprises. A spontaneous gift from the heart, no matter what it is will be looked upon by most people as generous and thoughtful. No disappointment for either the giver or the receiver. It is a WIN-WIN situation.

Celebrating an unbirthday is certainly not an original idea. Lewis Carroll introduced it long ago with his March Hare and Mad Hatter characters in Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.

There are no obligations to meet or any rules to follow in unbirthday gifting. You don't have to gift wrap an unbirthday present unless you want to. And the gift doesn't have to be brand new. If you no longer feel attached to an object, pass it on to someone you feel will appreciate it. Also, you don't have to know the person you are gifting. I once gave a stranger a necklace I was wearing because she complimented me on it while I was wearing it. I seldom wore it anyway and wanted her to have it because she obviously liked it. Naturally, I would not normally give away a personal item of mine just because someone complimented it. But in that particular circumstance it felt right. The whole idea behind gifting someone an unbirthday gift in my opinion is to only do so if doing it makes you feel good. It will be a bonus if you make the other person feel good too, that would make icing on the unbirthday cake!

Most of you likely already do unbirthday gifting throughout the year, you just haven't labeled it as such. One of my sisters sent me a bouquet of flowers on the first day of Spring several years ago. On the card she simple wrote HAPPY SPRING. I think of that every year at springtime and it brings a smile to my face. Whereas, I cannot remember all the countless birthday gifts I've gotten over the years with nearly the same fondness. A few years ago I took up the habit of tucking a seed packet of spring flowers along with my monthly payments mailed in April with a sticky note that reads APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY FLOWERS. I have no idea who the person might be that will end up opening up the envelope to process the billing. It doesn't matter, the simple gesture alone pleases me. Somehow, just thinking that someone might get a kick out of me doing this makes a warm feeling gush over me. I enjoy those warm healing vibes. Oh... and don't forget to treat yourself with a special unbirthday gift once in awhile, that feels wonderfully good too!