Receiving Love Can Be a Benefit of IllnessI had my share of illnesses while growing up (measles, mumps, chicken pox). Some of my fondest childhood memories are those times when my mother soothed my hurts during these occasions. Mom would cater to my every need by preparing special foods for me, giving me nurturing hugs, reading stories to me, etc. I learned early on that although being sick didn't feel good, the benefits were great! However, my mom is a strong and smart woman. Faking an illness to be allowed to stay home from school and receive the special treatment just couldn't be pulled over on her. This experience taught me that sickness had benefits to it, it was a way to get special attention, that equated to receiving an abundance of love. Because of this I have noticed a lowering energetic pattern, reducing me to feeling "puny" when I'm feeling deprived of love from others.
As part of my childhood imprinting I have also been conditioned to believe in strong work ethics from parental teachings. Both of my parents were hard workers, they still are. No slackers in our family. Responsibilities were not to be taken lightly in our home. Sickness was the only thing that could get me out of doing my chores. I can't recall a time I didn't have to do chores for any other reason. I took this "learned condition" into the work field when I came of working age. Looking back over the years, I realize that work stresses often manifested themselves into debilitating migraines. My migraines "sickness" allowed me an escape from work responsibilities. Never mind, that I was confined to a bed or retching vomit into the toilet. Some escape, huh!?! And as an adult, I didn't have mommy at my side lovingly nurturing me either. My fellow coworkers weren't exactly sympathetic to my pain as they had to pick up the slack at work and perform my duties.
Steps to Change Our Sick PatternsMy pattern was to work diligently, giving my all to the job. I never knew when to stop, in fact, I didn't know I had a choice to stop or to give 85 percent rather than 100 percent in order to reserve my energy. But my body knew how to stop me, it stopped me with excruciating PAIN that would sometimes confine me to my bedroom for three to four days at a time. I've since learned that it is okay to take a day off now and again for rest or recuperation when work is swallowing up my life energy... or to "play hooky" whenever I'm just beginning to feel the edges of stress accumulate, nurturing myself BEFORE any excruciating pain takes effect. This way I'm honoring my body by taking care of it's signals promptly. I am giving myself the love my mother taught me to welcome into my life before succumbing to a painful collapse of my body.
I tried to instill responsibility and strong work ethics in my own children when they were growing up. But I also wanted to teach them that some flexibility and honoring of the self would also serve them. I afforded my children one hooky day from school each year. They treasured that day. I would phone the school and tell my "little white lie" that my son or daughter was feeling feverish or whatever suited my mood while he/she would giggle in the background.
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