Devastating Effect of Prolonged Clutter
Sunday April 10, 2005
Reader Response to Quiz : Is Clutter Invading Your Space in a Negative Way? - A reader "C.T." says "I know first-hand the devastating effect of prolonged clutter on the emotional health of individuals and relationships. Depression and individual issues which interfered with facing and dealing with both the depression and the accompanying clutter caused by it, cost me my marriage. Of course, there were many factors, but one indicator of the state of our individual and the health of our communication and relationship has been the clutter --unmanageable and controlling many aspects of our lives-- and our children's.
Missed opportunities for socialization, bringing friends home, hosting activities or holiday events for family and friends have added to an overall state of dissatisfaction and stress over the years. While life has not been ALL negative, the negative effect is painfully obvious. It finally led to repressed bitterness and anger, which was a flashpoint, and an opportunity (excuse)to give up and give in to temptations and distractions outside the marriage in order to feel something different, have distance from the frustrations in the home, and a feeling of entitlement for leaving to look for relief and happiness elsewhere for my husband.
While all things work together to create a total life experience, the prolonged problem, unaddressed has proved devastating to me and my family. The shock and devastation have literally broken many of the bonds of depression--or changed it to a different form--and released a flood of energy fueled by desperation, anger and bitterness which has provided some relief through eliminating the source of the stress--in part, much of the clutter, and in part removing the individual from the situation.
Resulting family changes--divorce and moving out of the home to begin a new life--have finally focused all energy resources available to empty the house of both the bad and the good. Sadly, there was no happy ending here, but with the benefit of hindsight, perhaps a new beginning will establish a lifestyle where we 'surviving' family members are better managers of ourselves and the "things" needed or unneeded in our environment."
C.T.
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